1 post tagged “medical”

Having both parents in different hospitals with serious aggravations of their conditions is really taking a toll on me this week. The past two days have been a flurry of phonecalls and visits to one place or the other. Trying to get good information about what's going on with each of them is one of the hardest things I've ever done. Somehow the way healthcare is compartmentalized seems to really put up roadblocks at each turn.

Today my chief concern with my mom is she seems to have fallen into whatever the routine timetables are at the nursing home. So instead of going home sometime this week, she has a meeting on Monday to discuss her potential discharge the following Monday or the Monday after that. I think. I say I think because I have gotten three different dates from three different people. And when I ask if she is being kept for a compelling medical reason I get even weirder answers. Some don't relate to her situation at all and others seem to be kind of formulaic answers that do relate to her but don't seem very compelling particularly in light of her big picture condition. Every time I ask a few too many questions or they can't answer something I get referred to a different department or person. I shuffled through four yesterday before I decided I had to stop for the day. At least she's in a safe place and feeling ok. That had to be enough last night when I left for home.

It's really confusing for a non-medical layperson to figure out who to talk to to get a clear understanding of what's going on. On top of that, since she's in the nursing home, her regular doctors aren't seeing her. And her pulmonologist hasn't seen her at all for two weeks even though she went to the hospital with exacerbations that were diagnosed as being related to her COPD.  I know this because I asked him yesterday (after a bit of a rigamarole - just another minor roadblock along the way).

When she left the hospital last week, I was told by the primary care physician that she probably wouldn't need to be at the nursing home very long. And now I'm getting projections of 3-4 weeks. I don't really know what "not long" means to most people. But a month seems long to me, especially for someone who is looking and feeling as well as I've seen her in a year and who has end stage lung disease.

So I'm trying to figure out - do I just take her out of there? Is there some better way to work within the system?  Is there some way to do all this so that I don't consume every waking hour trying to figure out and make arrangements for her?

I really want her to be where she wants to be (home) as soon as it makes sense. I don't her to be in the nursing home a day more than is truly necessary. And I want what's best for her so she can have the best life during her remaining time. I don't expect miracles. I do want her to have the very best of the things we can control.

I haven't even mentioned my dad.  That's another story.